Courageous Conversations
Once a year, I make my yearly pilgrimage to the mall to update my work wardrobe. This pilgrimage is characterized by me finding the nearest entrance to Macy’s Men’s department, entering the building, and heading directly to the Men’s section, avoiding any and all distractions, including shoe salesmen and the ladies in the cologne section, trying to shower me with the season’s latest scents. My goal? To get in and out as quickly as possible, having spent the least amount of money and with the right clothes in hand to look sharp.
This past week, my yearly ritual took an unexpected turn. Having achieved my goal of finding the right shirt and pant combination in near record time, I stood satisfied at the checkout counter, ready to pay, and prepared to escape the building, having completed my mission quickly. However, the cashier, a middle-aged woman with a strong Irish accent and a colourful sense of humour, began to engage me in small talk.
The conversation began with a lighthearted joke about the ghost of her late mother-in-law. It quickly took a philosophical turn when she declared that she did not believe in any one God and that we are all energy, destined to return to the source or energy that sustains and connects all life on earth. With an empty stare and a tone of regret, she confessed that she would love to believe there was more beyond the grave.
Dead set on completing my mission, I politely expressed that it would have been lovely to sit and explore her thoughts over a cup of tea. I then paid my bill and went on my way. It wasn't until I reached my car that I realized I was so focused on myself and my plan that I had, unfortunately, failed to see and hear her and, as a result, lost the opportunity to have a courageous conversation.
So what does a courageous conversation look like? How should we, as Christians, engage in these conversations about faith and religion? How do we do so in a spirit of truth and love? Jesus’s encounter with the Samaritan woman in John 4:5-30 gives us a wonderful model for engaging in these potentially life-changing conversations. I encourage you to read the full account in the 4th chapter of John.
I. Be willing to step out of your comfort zone and meet people where they are. John 4:5-7
There are a number of things to note from this exchange. First, there was little interaction during those days between Jews and Samaritans since the Samarians were part Jew and part Gentile. There was little love between the two communities. Nonetheless, it is in Samaria that Jesus departs from societal norms and interacts directly with the Samaritan woman requesting that she draw water.
When called to engage in courageous conversations, we must be willing and prepared to meet people where they are. That might mean meeting them where they are geographically, emotionally, intellectually, or spiritually.
II. Speak the truth in love. John 4:16-24
Note that in His conversation with the Samaritan woman, Jesus did not shy away from addressing the circumstances that she was facing at the time. She had been married five times, and the man she was living with at the time was not her husband. A key aspect of speaking the truth to someone involves speaking the truth about the sin in their life. We are not called to do so with a spirit of condemnation but rather in a spirit of love with the purpose of helping them toward repentance.
III Share the good news John 4:25-26
When we are engaging in courageous conversations, it is important to remember that Jesus is the author and star of the story. We have the personal story of our walk with the Lord, the power of the Holy Spirit, and the Bible to help us to share who He really is and help them to have a personal encounter with the risen Christ.
IV Be patient and watch the good news spread.
39 Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman's testimony, “He told me all that I ever did.” 40 So when the Samaritans came to him, they asked him to stay with them, and he stayed there two days. 41 And many more believed because of his word. 42 They said to the woman, “It is no longer because of what you said that we believe, for we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this is indeed the Savior of the world.” John 4:39-42
Fear, doubt, a lack of self-confidence, or a desire to find the perfect words, there are many reasons why we might be reluctant to or even unwilling to have courageous conversations. In my case, I was distracted by my goals and failed to truly see her and hear her needs. Furthermore, there is no promise that we will see immediate results from the conversation. The unfortunate truth is that some people may not be ready to hear the truth and act on it. It is important that we cover every courageous conversation with prayer, asking the Lord to prepare their hearts. When the seed is planted and the heart is prepared, there is no limit to the potential impact of courageous conversations like the one at the well in Samaria.
Prayer
Lord, as we go through our daily routines, please remind us that we are in a world that is searching for meaning and searching for truth. When the opportunity arises, give us the courage to share your truth. Let us not be hindered by fear nor doubt nor prejudice or self-righteousness, but let us move forward in humility with patience and in love so that others may come to know you.
Amen,
Brad
